In news that will make you feel sick to your stomach Paris Hilton will be replacing Lindsay Lohan for New Year’s Eve. Lohan had been schedule to host a party at the LAX nightclub at the Luxor in Vegas, but in an effort to stay sober backed out o the event. Who would the club turn to in order to stay a hot party spot? Paris Hilton is taking over the the recently sober Lohan. The kicker is that Paris will take home a cool $1,000,000 to host the event!!! What the hell did I go to college for and why am I working 40 hours a week?? I can only imagine what drinks are gonna cost at this event! I did New Year’s in Vegas to see in 2001, but no way would I be waiting online 6 hours to see Paris up in a VIP section.
Now that I am out of prison I am going to help…what?!?
One Million — forget the people I need money!